: A

s no longer in Lan

, months earlier, while Lucinda smoothed

h be

jacket. "What was wr

yourself properly bef

red a

properly. I'd checked my appearance before lea

, Lucinda

said, adjusting it again. "An

sn't c

s now. You'

en ran her hands over my shoulders as i

rd? You're a celebrity. You should look like one

ayer, Lucinda. N

posed to excuse

aled

phers waited behind the barriers, calling out to arrivin

interviews, smile for the camer

girlfriend searched for imperfections

o in now?

il I'm f

d rearranged the

cin

ha

e it

nds dr

she looked gen

look presentable, and yo

table before

s deba

ol. She could turn the simplest request into an arg

inspected me and f

and before she

s nothing wrong

in

her hand aw

ome out and you look like you could

photographers, and the irrit

pped her arm through mine and leaned

cinda! Ov

de me. To anyone watching, we were the perfect couple: the cele

er hand resting on my arm and the

hs would show how she'd sp

never

dent had happene

wned for years. It was comfortable, warm and perfectly

had othe

not keep weari

up from my phone.

embarra

on't we

though I'd deliberat

. You look like you've

my pho

wrong with it.

eater up from the

owing th

you'r

ed direc

use

d me. Put

alked out of t

of sight. When I asked about it lat

it in th

my hand, wondering how a piece of clothing had

ted her, she d

earing it anyw

int. I told you no

you it loo

t gave you the righ

e making a ridiculous fu

ing for her to unders

neve

tood perfectly well a

criticise my choices or tell me how she thought I should pr

to respect me w

niences and my decisions as things she could

ing over things that shouldn't have

le

ught me back to

and look

ill resting lightly

he asked,

t her hand, then

uch a small gesture had caught my atte

tened. Desperate for L

for problems where

fectionate with me. There was nothing st

breath and gave

. I'm ju

hould get s

"I'm not the one i

u look wors

e is," I

and slipping back

r it and hel

I wasn't going to turn a familiar gesture into somethi

rly lost

irst day I had her back searc