My little sister, Ellie was crying behind me-a small, choked sound that felt like it was tearing my soul in two.
"Ellie... princess... shh... shh..."
My voice came out as a hoarse, broken rasp. I turned my head slowly. Hot blood trickled from my forehead, dripping onto the steering wheel.
"Dad?"
No answer.
"Mom?" I called out.
Mom was slumped against the window, her head twisted at an unnatural angle.
Dad... Dad looked like he was sleeping, but it was a sleep far too deep.
Ellie's cries grew louder, more frantic.
"Ellie... I'm coming," I said, trying to soothe her, also trying to soothe myself.
My parents didn't stir-not at my sister's screams, not at my fumbling movements.
I forced the door open, my legs buckling as I stumbled out. My fingers felt like they belonged to someone else as I fumbled with her car seat buckle. I pulled my little sister into my arms, holding her tight against my chest. She buried her face in my neck, her tiny hands gripping my shirt as if I were the last solid thing on earth.
"It's okay, baby... I'm here... I'm here..."
A lie.
Nothing was okay.
But it was the only thing I had left to give her.
I staggered away from the car with Ellie in my arms. The asphalt was hot enough to burn through the soles of my sneakers. Darkness crept in at the edges of my vision.
"I'll be back, Dad... I'll be back, Mom... I swear..."
A weak voice, barely a whisper, drifted from the other car-the one crushed against ours, the two vehicles fused into one mangled wreck.
"Please... My son..."
I looked. A blonde woman was trapped between the steering wheel and the buckled dashboard. Her pale dress was soaked in red. So much red.
She clutched her stomach with both hands, as if trying to hold herself together. And in the back seat, a little boy, maybe three years old, was crying. He was strapped into his car seat, his blond hair matted to his tear-streaked face.
My heart stopped, then hammered against my ribs so hard it ached.
"I'll get him! I'll get him!"
I carefully set Ellie down on the pavement. A woman I'd never seen before was already running toward us.
"Give her to me!" the stranger shouted, her eyes wide with panic.
I handed my sister over. Ellie thrashed, screaming my name.
"I'll be right back, little princess, I'll be right back," I promised, my voice shaking.
I ran to the other car. The heat rolling off it was a physical blow. I yanked at the rear door with both hands. The metal seared my palms, but the lock gave way. I scooped up the boy. He clung to me instantly, his arms and legs wrapping around me like a terrified little monkey.
"It's okay... It's okay, little one..."
I moved back to the front door. The woman reached out a trembling hand and gripped my wrist. Her green eyes were filled with tears, but also with a calm that sent a chill down my spine.
"What... what's your name, angel?"
"Emma." My voice cracked.
She smiled. A smile so beautiful and so sad, I knew I would carry it with me for the rest of my life.
"Emma..." she repeated, as if committing the name to memory. "Thank you... for saving my Luca."
"You're going to be okay," I lied, because it felt like what you were supposed to say. "I'll get you out of here, I promise, I-"
She shook her head slowly. The blood was flowing faster now.
"No, sweetheart. My time is up."
Her gaze shifted to Luca, who was trembling in my arms. "But his isn't. Take him. Run. Live for him. Love for me."
Hot tears burned my cheeks. The words were a crushing weight, coming from someone already half-gone.
"I'll come back! I swear I'll come back for you and my parents..."
"Emma." She squeezed my hand with impossible strength. "Listen to a dying mother: save my son. It's the only thing I ask of this world."
A man's shout cut through the air.
"GAS LEAKING! IT'S GONNA BLOW, RUN!"
I looked back. My dad... My dad's eyes were open.
Just for a second.
He saw me. He moved his lips, the effort immense.
"Run, sweetheart. Run, my girl, and take care of Ellie."
"Dad!" I screamed.
The woman squeezed my hand one last time.
"I'll come back, ma'am..." My voice was barely a thread of sound.
"My name's Clara," she told me, tears finally streaming down her face. "Go, Emma. Go and don't look back. Make this day the beginning of a beautiful story for the three of you."
"The three of us?" I asked, confused. Her eyes flickered toward my sister, who was screaming for me from the stranger's arms.
I heard sirens wailing in the distance. Help was coming. Luca clung to me even tighter. And that was when the first explosion hit.
"RUN, EMMA!!!" my dad screamed, his voice thick with tears.
"Go, sweetheart," Clara whispered. "Save your lives!"
I couldn't speak. I just nodded, choking on a sob. She let go of my hand slowly, as if she were handing over the most precious thing in the universe.
I looked at my dad...
"Dad..." I whispered.
"Be happy, my princess. Daddy loves you."
My body screamed at me to stay, the urge to run to him a physical ache.
"IT'S GOING TO EXPLODE!!!"
That was the last thing I heard. And then I... ran.
I ran with Luca clutched to my chest as Ellie screamed my name just yards away.
I ran as the ground shook beneath me.
I ran as the air grew too hot, too heavy.
And then... The world exploded behind me.
A wave of heat threw me forward. I collapsed to my knees on the asphalt, instinctively shielding Luca with my body.
The blast was so loud my ears bled.
When I lifted my head, the sky was orange. And everything I loved... had turned to fire.
"Mom... Dad..." I whispered, and the world went black.
I woke with a gasp, sucking in air as if I were still trapped in the smoke. My heart hammered against my ribs, a painful, frantic rhythm. My hands clenched, grasping for Luca and Ellie, even though they weren't there.
Two years.
Two years, and that damn day was still lodged inside me like a piece of shrapnel. I could swear I still smelled it-gasoline, fire, the scent of a world ending.
I squeezed my eyes shut for a second, forcing myself to remember where I was.
My room.
The lopsided bed.
The warm, soft breathing beside me.
Ellie.
I turned too quickly, and my heart seized when my hand touched her skin.
Burning.
She was burning with fever. Her forehead glistened with sweat. Her little body was restless, her breaths coming in short, shallow pants.
No. Not now.
My stomach plummeted. Today was the interview. The one chance I had to pull us out of this miserable spiral. And I had no money to spare. Not for medicine. Not for a doctor. Not even enough to miss a day of work.
I swallowed, but the despair was a hard lump in my throat, scraping and raw.
"Ellie... little one... hold on a little longer, please," I murmured, brushing the damp hair from her forehead.
My heart beat out of rhythm. It was the same feeling from two years ago, just before the world exploded.
The only difference was, this time, I couldn't run.
I had to choose.
And time, as always, was not on my side.