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   Chapter 41 NO.41

The Marriage Demands By NSH_SHAHEEN Characters: 12360

Updated: 2018-09-12 12:23


The wind was soft as it blew in the air. The sun was setting and the breeze was getting cool.

"It's beautiful isn't it?" she smiled. She always looked so dazzling when she smiled. I would forever picture that smile and save it in my memory.

I returned her smile and wound my arms around her waist, resting my chin on her head as we stared into the sunset.

"Yeah it's beautiful but not as beautiful as you." I told her. I felt her head bow down in coyness when I said the word beautiful. Even after so many years, she's still not used to it. Whenever I call her beautiful, she just doesn't believe me.

"We should go inside, it's Maghrib time now." she said.

"In a few minutes, " I mumbled and hugged her closely, burying my face in her left shoulder, inhaling her fresh scent of grapes and roses.

"I want to be with you now." I murmured against her neck and kissed it softly. She moved and her soft chuckle reached my ears.

"I'm always with you."

"Daddy?"

I was shaken from my slumber. Breathing in, I realized that I was sleeping on my arms while working at my desk and fell asleep.

Sitting upright, I stretched my aching arms and yawned.

"Daddy?" I heard and my head snapped in that direction. Zeeshan was standing at the corner of the desk and looking at me with a weary expression.

"Yes Zeeshan?" I replied, my voice hoarse from sleeping. "What is it?" I asked.

"You didn't give us dinner." He mumbled lowly. I glanced at my wrist watch and realized that it was 1 am.

"Oh God." I said and quickly got up. I fell asleep while working again.

It's been a month since we arrived back New York City. Jake helped me a lot especially in getting a decent condo. He offered me a position in his firm. He inherited my parents dairy business when they retired and gave me a good job as financier in the firm.

"Where is Ayesha?" I asked. Taking his small hand in mine, I walked him to the kitchen.

"She's asleep. She was really tired so she made a peanut butter sandwich and fell asleep afterwards." He replied.

Oh my God, I can't believe that I forgot about the kids again. I've engulfed myself in so much work that all my time is spent in work and I've totally disregarded my kids. Oh God, what the hell am I doing?

I quickly fixed my son a cold turkey sandwich. As I watched him quietly eat, he looked so solemn. He reminded me so much of her. His quiet nature resembled so much of her.

I haven't been able to sleep ever since she left. And when I do sleep, I get to be with her. That's my only sanctuary.

"Zeeshan, I'm really sorry buddy. I didn't mean to get so busy it's just that I have so much work to do and, "

"I know Abu. You don't need to worry I understand." He said and finished his sandwich. I sighed with relief but my guilt was eating me up. I was glad that my son was just like his mother but Ayesha, she was so like me—emotional and sentimental.

"I know buddy. I'm really sorry." I mumbled and took his place.

"Abu, when will we go back?" he inquired. I froze dead in my tracks. I gripped the edges of the sink in order to balance myself.

"We are not going back, baita."

"And what about Ammi? We've left her behind. Did you guys have a fight?" he enquired. How innocent he was. Oh God, it's been so long and I haven't even explain to them the situation.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping now? You have school in the morning." I tried to change the subject and washed his plate.

"I don't like this school Abu. I want to go back home. I miss Ammi and all my friends back at home."

He was constantly talking about her and my patience was wearing thin. "Zeeshan, please go to bed." I said sternly and led him to his room.

ybe I'd die before my time whether it was by sickness or by accident. I just knew that I would leave this world early. Even when I was alone after Tooba died and suffering from Tumor, I thought for sure I would die. But I didn't. Allah gave me a chance to live my life to the fullest and I became a mother to two beautiful children and wife to a wonderful amazing man.

I don't have any regrets. I know that if I lose my life, Zac will be hurt the most. But I know him, he'll move on. That's just how he is. It's his nature. Allah made him into such a strong and stout hearted person. I'm sure, he'll take care of our kids in the event that something were to happen to me. I have full faith. I don't deny his abilities as a capable parent. When he's such a perfect human being, who cares so much and his loyalty and love runs deep, I have no doubt that he will make it through. I know him. He loves me so much and I know he'll be hurt. But I'm sure, he'll get over it. He has to.

If I have any regret, then it's that I never told him how much I love him. How much he means to me. He's my light. He's my peace.

Zac, I love you so much.

"Oh God!"

I closed the journal respectfully and kissed it.

Her last words were that she loved me. It made my bleeding heart feel warm and slowly, with just that, I felt as if I could pick up the shattered pieces of my heart and put them back together.

The walls tumbled down. The floods are now flowing and my emotions are free.

Amber.

Her smiling face is in my mind.

I haven't thought about her or her name because I was so afraid. It hurts so much whenever I think about her. She was a big piece of my heart and when she left, she took that piece with her.

But now, her words have given me courage. She had so much faith and trust me. And all I've done till now is show irresponsibility. How could I be so selfish? I even neglected our kids.

Although if still hurts, but now I know: she loved me and that's enough for me. I've lost her but I know, she still alive in my heart.

She left our kids in my care and I won't disappoint her.

After so long, I feel my heart beat with a purpose. It's warm again. My mind that was in shambles is starting to gain its function. It's finally ready to grasp that my Bree isn't with me anymore.

My broken heart. Although I feel again, but it'll take a long time for it to heal.

And inshaa Allah, just as Amber had thought, I'll make it through this.

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