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   Chapter 19 No.19

McEdifice Returns By CamestrosFelapton Characters: 5369

Updated: 2017-12-27 12:02


And then…then HE arrived. Broad shouldered and with a commanding charisma. A man who brooked no compromise, who knew where he stood and how he stood there. A man whose very name said "Chiseled". With one powerful movement of his bemuscled arms, he freed me from the grip of my alien possession. At that moment I knew love for the first time.

But no sooner had we met than he left me. Yet for one brief moment I had been noticed. But more than that I was FREE, free to follow my two deepest desires!

? To dance! To dance like Fontaine! Like Baryshikov! Like Toni "Mickey Your So Fine" Basil!

? To photocopy my own bottom.

Admittedly the second one was less edifying. And yet…

Via the transformation required for both hobbies I discovered the secrets of multidimensional spatial manipulation. And by using those powers and the incorporation of an ansible projector into my functions, I could repay my debt to him by heading back in time to rescue my true love – Chiseled McEdifice.

Together at last, he held me in his powerful arms and said:

"WAKE UP MCEDIFICE!"

In a surprisingly higher pitched voice.

"WAKE. UP. MC. EDIFICE!" his voice insisted. This was not what I expected at all.

Suddenly I was drenched as if somebody had poured a bucket of cold water all over me.

I sat up with a start. Over to my left was ScanScan the Dancing Photocopier man shaking his head in a befuddle manner. Standing over me, holding a bucket, was Qzrrzxxzq.

"Wait, " I asked, "Am I Chiseled McEdifice or am I ScanScan the Dancing Photocopier Man?"

"You're McEdifice, " stated Qzrrzxxzq.

"

tened unkempt villages, ghastly space ports occupied by coffin shaped shuttle rockets, administrative buildings shaped like, um, um, spooky office buildings, bodies impaled on spikes, spikes impaled on bodies. Oh the whole place is blood and scary but also kind of sexy but not in away that is too kinky because we'd like the movie version to be rated PG-13(US)/12(UK)/M(Aus) – we can probably fine tune it by adding some swear words if it gets too close to PG (which would be just lame). Anyhoo, it is your imagination so you can make it as freaky as you like just don't tell Timothy as he can get a bit squeamish.

DRACULON 6! The Vampire Planet! Yes, you heard me right! It is a planet FULL of vampires! Permanent cloud cover from its blood red clouds means that the vampires had no need to fear the caustic beams of the local sun. Surrounded by vampire friendly architecture and like, just LOADS of crypts and spooky places! The only non-vampires? Frightened villages, kept alive purely for sport! You think you would last FIVE MINUTES in this place? No way, José!

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